11.The One with Mrs. Bing

Season:1 Episode:11 First Aired:1/5/1995 Prod Code: 456660

Guide
Chandler's romance novelist mom comes to New York to visit him and he's not sure how he feels about it, especially after Joey catches Mrs. Bing and Ross kissing. Meanwhile, Monica and Phoebe compete for the "attention" of Coma Guy, who gets hit by an ambulance after Monica woo-woo's at him on the street.

Summary
Monica & Phoebe are walking to a newsstand. Phoebe wants to check and see if they have the previous day's news to see if her horoscope came true. A really hot guy is walking by Monica & Phoebe, causing both to drool. As he walks by, he says "Nice hat" causing the girls to say thank you in unison.
Phoebe tells Monica to whistle at him. She can't. But she does shout "woo-woo" to the guy, who turns around startled. Monica points to Phoebe & the guy gets hit by a truck.
At the hospital, the guy is in a coma. Monica & Phoebe come to visit. Monica can't believe she shouted "woo-woo" to the guy, she takes the blame for his coma. Phoebe bends down to talk to the coma guy, shouting "Get up, you girl scout! Up! Up! Up!" hoping that will wake him.
Monica looks at his face and wishes she knew his name. She bets he is a lawyer because he "looks" smart. Phoebe looks at the dents in his knuckles, making him artistic. The two spend the next couple minutes fantasizing about what the guy does for a living and his hobbies.
At Monica & Rachel's, the gang is present, talking about the coma guy. Rachel gets excited and turns up the TV, the Jay Leno show is on and Chandler's mum is about to make her appearance.
Everyone has settled down to watch, except Chandler. His mum, Nora Tyler Bing is on Leno to talk about her new book, "Euphoria Unbound." Chandler doesn't want to watch, he is completely embarrassed. Rachel tells Chandler how much she loves his mum's books.
Rachel opens the door to let Paulo in. They kiss. Ross wonders when "Rigatoni" returned from Rome. He hoped the plane would have exploded. Phoebe tells the gang that Nora is on. Paulo recognizes her.
Jay Leno interviews Nora Bing and asks about her being arrested in London. Mrs. Bing acts a little embarrassed, stating that sometimes after having sex, she has a craving for Kung Pow Chicken. Sending Chandler over the edge completely.
On the Tonight Show, Jay asks how her book tour is doing. She mentions she is going to New York tomorrow, which she hates, but she gets to see her son, so she loves it. The gang gives a round of "aw".
Jay tells Mrs. Bing that he doesn't see her as a mum at all. Prompting Chandler's mum to tell Leno that she bought her son his first condom, making her a fabulous mother. The gang gives a surprised look at Chandler, which only humiliates him more.
Next, we see a montage of clips of Monica & Phoebe visiting the coma guy. First, Monica reads the paper to the guy. Next, the two drag a huge plant into the room. Then, Monica knits a sweater, then Phoebe singing to him, shaving him & chatting to Monica about what name to give him.
At a Mexican restaurant, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler, and his mom are there. Mrs. Bing looks at Chandler's menu and mentions how hungry she is, causing Chandler to retort "Please God don't let it be Kung Pow Chicken."
Ross enters the restaurant. Mrs. Bing gives him a hug. She asks who is up for shots. Monica & Phoebe accept. Mrs. Bing asks Ross, but he declines. Rachel & Paulo enter; both look flustered, like they just had sex in a car on the way over. Ross downs the shot.
Time passes. Ross is very drunk, holding the shot glass to his eye like a jeweler's eyepiece. Rachel feeds Paulo some food. He eats it and licks her hand afterward.
Rachel tells Mrs. Bing what a big fan she is of her books. Mrs. Bing takes the flattery in stride saying anyone can write a romance book if you "start with half a dozen European cities; throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia." Again, Chandler looks very embarrassed.
Cut to Mrs. Bing talking on the phone, asking if she has any voices messages. Ross emerges from the ladies bathroom. Mrs. Bing takes note and asks if he is okay. He pretends he is alright. But she tells him, "It's the Italian Hand-Licker, isn't it." Ross tells her it's not Paulo, it's Rachel. Mrs. Bing gets it.
Mrs. Bing tries to cheer up Ross by saying that she is a professional romance writer, she knows how to write a man a woman would fall in love with and that type of man is not Paulo. She calls him a "secondary character," someone that eventually gets killed by the hero, aka Ross. She kisses him on the cheek before kissing him on the mouth. Joey enters to see the kiss.
The next morning at Chandler & Joey's apartment. Ross knocks on the door and asks if Chandler is there. When Joey answers yes, Ross drags him into the hall and slams the door to find out if he told Chandler about the kiss. He didn't.
Ross is trying to make himself believe the kiss was no big deal. But Joey tells him he "broke the code"; you never kiss a friend's mum. Chandler opens the door & startles them. He picks up the paper and asks what they are doing in the hall.
Ross tells him that he and Joey were supposed to go to a racquetball game but ‘somebody' overslept. Joey, thinking Ross is being real, accuses Ross of not calling first. Chandler just gives the two a strange look before going back inside and shutting the door.
Phoebe is at the hospital, stroking the Coma Guy's hair when Monica enters with a bunch of balloons. Monica didn't expect Phoebe to be there, and Phoebe asks why Monica is there.
Monica brushes Coma Guy's hair in the other direction, causing Phoebe to shout "No!" Phoebe asks Monica if she stopped by earlier, Monica denies it. But Phoebe whips back the sheet and shows Monica that somebody changed his pajamas.
At Chandler & Joey's, Ross is talking to Chandler while Joey makes a snack at the bar. Ross tells Chandler that Paulo kissed Mrs. Bing. He catches the scowl on Joey's face and confesses that it was not Paulo that kissed his mum, it was Ross.
He tells Chandler that he was so upset about Rachel & Paulo, combined with all the tequila shots; he kissed Mrs. Bing as a result. He tells Chandler that is all that happened, he can ask Joey. Shocked, Chandler turns to Joey, he can't believe Joey never told him.
Chandler gets angry at Ross and cannot believe he kissed his mum & walks toward the door. Chandler leaves, slamming the door.
At Central Perk, Rachel is writing something down as Monica walks up. She reads the paper, "A Woman Undone, by Rachel Karen Green.” Rachel is obviously inspired by Mrs. Bing.
Phoebe walks up with her guitar, asking Monica if she will be at the hospital later. Both say they aren't. Phoebe then turns to Rachel and asks if she can play a song.
Rachel goes to the microphone and introduces Phoebe. Phoebe tells the crowd she is going to sing a song about a man she recently met. Monica gives her a look. She is singing about the coma guy and notices Monica sneaking out. Not wanting to leave the coma guy with Monica, she thanks the crowd and runs out, knocking over the mic stand.
Chandler enters, wondering what is up with Phoebe. Ross starts to answer but is cut off by Chandler who says he was talking to Joey, calling Ross a "Mother-Kisser". Ross gets up from the couch and goes to the counter to talk to Chandler.
Chandler is upset, not at his mother, but at Ross. He tells Ross that he expects this behavior from her but not from his friend. Ross tells Chandler he needs to talk to his mother about this issue rather than taking it out on him.
At the hospital, Monica bursts into the room. Closely followed by Phoebe. But the Coma Guy is not in his bed. The sound of a flushing toilet is heard & Coma Guy emerges from the bathroom.
Monica & Phoebe are excited. He asks them "who are you?" Monica & Phoebe introduce themselves, as his caretakers. The two girls begin fighting; telling the guy what each of them did for him while he was in the coma.
The Coma Guy thanks the girls and says he will "see you around", causing both girls to get a little annoyed. They spent so much time with him. Monica tells him the least he can say is, "I'll call you." The Coma Guy tells her he will call her but Phoebe calls his bluff. The two leave the hospital mad at the guy they spent so long taking care of.
Back at Chandler's place, he is talking with his mum. She is telling him good-bye; she has a flight to catch to Lisbon. She gives him a kiss and goes to leave, but before she does Chandler brings up the kiss she had with Ross.
Mrs. Bing re-enters the apartment and tells Chandler it was "stupid" and she apologizes and promises it will never happen again.
Cut to Joey listening at the door, Ross walks up. The two are listening in on Chandler & his mum. Joey is telling Ross everything he is hearing, the argument, everything. All of a sudden he doesn't hear anything and looks through the peep-hole & sees the two walking toward the door, he tells Ross to run.
Joey runs down the hall. Ross tries to get into Monica's apartment, but it's locked. So he stands in the hall and pretends he wasn't listening as Chandler & his mom come out, their issues resolved.
Chandler & Ross shake hands, making up in their own manly way. Ross asked how it went. Chandler is glad it’s done & he got his feelings off his chest.
At Monica & Rachel's, Rachel is giving a copy of her book out to the gang. She tells them it’s the fist chapter and she wants their "honest opinion". The first chapter is plagued with typos, making all the sexual innuendos more funny than romantic.

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